Everyone's an expert

Written for Funeralcare magazine, September 2019

Thanks to the internet, everyone’s an expert.

Doctors are feeling it, scientists, retailers, celebrants, funeral directors… are being challenged by disbelief in their expertise, and called out to justify charging for that expertise. Expertise is underrated, undervalued, and under attack.

What causes some people to believe that they know as much, if not more, than those who have many years of training and experience in their chosen fields? How have they come to believe that an hour surfing the net for information is as valuable, if not more so, than years of training, experience and the practice, practice, practice that makes the proverbial perfect?

I’m not criticising the natural curiosity leading to a little research and some well-informed questions. Or wanting the best quality for the lowest price. I’m puzzled about a whole new level of arrogance. A full-blown belief that, for all your training and experience, you know less than they do. And wow, the rates you’re charging? Mark Knopfler plays it expertly in “Money for Nothing”. There is not just reluctance, but resentment at paying for knowledge and expertise. Truth may be backed by science, but suddenly no-one believes the scientist.

Don’t get me wrong – there are many people out there who “get it”. But there is an increasing groundswell who don’t, and whose challenges are confrontational and leave us feeling bruised. They’re probably a minority, but that’s the odd thing about human nature, we tend to focus on criticism rather than celebrating success.

A close friend of mine has built a successful swimwear business from scratch spanning 30 years. The business grew out of her passion for dressmaking and pattern construction – so add another 15 years of experience and expertise to that. No surprise: she knows her stuff. Recently she spent an hour fitting a customer, narrowing her choices, and helping her to identify a favourite item. Did she buy it? Of course not. “I can get it cheaper online” the young woman said. Once she had recovered the power of speech, my friend suggested that might be “a little unfair”, given her investment of time and expertise. The aftermath was ugly. Today’s call-out culture saw the unleashing of a social media smear campaign that reduced the store’s online rating to a single star, and culminated in its closure.

Our “shop fronts” are not the only areas being challenged. You may have met the amateur celebrant who doesn’t think a service needs a structure. Or the friends who built-with-love an unfortunately ill-shaped coffin that couldn’t house its intended occupant. The daughter who arrived on the day of the funeral and couldn’t believe the cost “for an hour’s work”.

Admittedly I come from an era where doctors, police officers and accountants were respected, where a handshake or promise was law, where a “gentleman’s agreement” was honoured and honourable. We didn’t need lawyers to… wait, what? Never mind.

Yes, the world has changed. The world wide web can tell you anything you want to know. Intern’s hypochondria, once the domain of second-year med students, has been supplanted by cyberchondria, as Doctor Google will help you not only self-diagnose, but frustrate the bedside manner out of your medical professional.

There is widespread distrust in formerly highly regarded professions and cornerstones of society. Newspapers report outrage at delays in medical diagnosis and treatment. Don’t trust your doctor. Untrained funeral providers leap on the bandwagon – or the stationwagon – making mistakes that exacerbate grieving. Don’t trust your funeral director. Teachers are fired for “inappropriate conduct”. Every day we are bombarded with stories of failures of hospitals, government departments, the judicial system.

Is there any way to reverse this, to restore faith and trust? I’m no expert, but I have some ideas. I believe that individuals can effect change. One of my favourite pieces of wisdom from Margaret Mead reads “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.”

Can we change the call-out culture? The comparative anonymity of the internet leads people to vent their spleens (to use an old-fashioned term) and vilify those who dare to disagree. What if we treated people generously and with respect instead? What if we listened to them, paused to seek the truth, questioned what we see and hear, explored further than the sound-bite? What if we were well-informed enough to develop our own opinions instead of merely parroting those of others?

We all know those who don’t know what they don’t know: who know it all already and can’t be told or trained. Those who are hell-bent on explaining space to astronauts. Who overestimate their own ability, or underestimate the complexities of a role due to naivety or arrogance. Don’t be that person. Learn to recognise expertise and experts. Don’t teach your grandmother how to suck eggs.

Be open to learning. I worked with someone once whose motto about learning was this: “Fifty percent is a pass mark. If you get 60%, you’ve worked ten percent too hard.” I get the humour in the remark – but is making an effort really a waste? I believe that anyone can be a funeral director/celebrant/board member. But to be a good funeral director/celebrant/board member requires effort.

Even if others recognise that you are very good at what you do, never forget that you can always get better. Commit to being the best that you can be. Commit to gaining expertise. Aim beyond expertise to mastery. You will never reach it, no matter how good you are. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth aiming for.

Demonstrate your expertise. Instead of talking it up, show what you know. Be open. Be transparent. Mentor others. Knowledge is power when everyone’s an expert. Learn how to spot spin. Learn how to expose fakes. Learn how to recognise, and value, expertise.

<climbs down off soapbox>